Monkey Punch I’d Rather Be Playing With My Monkey Assholes Live Forever Shirt Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Fresh Design, Premium Fabric — Printed Just for You
That feeling when someone stops you and says ‘yo, where’d you get that?’ — that’s what this is. Premium Gildan® cotton, DTG-printed so the colors hit different and never fade. Your new go-to, trust us.
📸 Don’t let the mockup fool you — this isn’t just a tee. Get this design on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. You pick, we produce. Simple as that.
Why You’ll Love It
- 🎨 Print That Pops — DTG-printed directly into the fabric. No cracking, no peeling — just bold, vivid color.
- 🧵 Not Your Average Blank — Gildan® Ultra Cotton & Heavy Blend — the same blanks top brands trust.
- 👕 Comfort First, Always — Taped neck, reinforced shoulders, tear-away tag. Built for all-day wearability.
- 🇺🇸 Sustainably Sourced — US Cotton Trust Protocol. From farm to fabric — responsible at every step.
Fabric & Construction
- T-Shirt (5.3 oz) & Long Sleeve (6 oz): 100% cotton — airy, comfortable, all-season wear.
- Fleece (Sweatshirt & Hoodie): 8 oz cotton/poly blend — warm, smooth surface, anti-pill finish.
- Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.
Choose Your Style
Find your size and pick your color — it’s that easy:
Available Colors
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27.95 in (71 cm) | 36.22 in (92 cm) | 33.46 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29.13 in (74 cm) | 40.16 in (102 cm) | 35.04 in (89 cm) |
| L | 29.92 in (76 cm) | 44.09 in (112 cm) | 36.61 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31.1 in (79 cm) | 48.03 in (122 cm) | 38.19 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 31.89 in (81 cm) | 51.97 in (132 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33.07 in (84 cm) | 55.91 in (142 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 33.86 in (86 cm) | 59.84 in (152 cm) | 38.98 in (99 cm) |
Tap a style above to view its chart. Measured laid flat.
- Use the color chart to explore your options.
- Check the size chart for measurements.
- Select, add to cart, and enjoy!
When Will It Arrive?
- ✅ Production: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 USA Standard: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ USA Rush: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 International: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Discover more at threadnative.com — where great design meets great quality.